It’s the last stretch of the year, which means work is piling but grateful for the light at the end of the tunnel (which is the 20th of November) lol. I am also grateful that I don’t have to travel for work this time around. Which means, despite my crazy workload I can still keep my routine. yay.

I’m just thinking about what the remaining days of the year would look like. I haven’t got anything planned but maybe I should do a pop-up for my brownies or something. At least there will be something to look forward to. I’ve been meaning to have a bake sale for a while now but social distancing got in the way. And apart from Munah my only “kitchen staff”…. I am short-staffed. lol. technically Munah isn’t even under me. She’s employed by my Babu. lol. So it’s actuallynya means it’s just me running my own shit and losing my shit (sometimes)!!!!!. I really don’t know how she does it. She does the cleaning for the household, the washing.. and once every two weeks she helps me out for brownies. baik tah check weewee nya kali, tau tau besabu. huhu.


hey my first joke. in ages. *slow clap*

I’ve just realized that i haven’t been as funny. aku mellow sudah tua tua ani. I’ve just been self-reflecting a lot in my writings. kali target audience ku pun berubah sudah… i’m trying to appeal to the “mellowed out – banyak masaalah – tapi bawa besabar dan berdzikir” market segment. hahaha. Who else feels the same way? hahaha.

These days i run from drama. If you see me running on the road i am definitely setting myself free from whatever drama that has “found” me during the day. hahaha. sebenarnya running doesn’t solve problems. it’s like getting likes on instagram, it’s merely a form of instant gratification. the endorphins make you feel a little bit better and tricks you into thinking that your problem is over… tapi sebenarnya it’s far from it. lol. which is why you should always go back to it when you’re sober. journalling helps. but just like getting likes on my ig feed, i still love running.

I am glad i had picked it up in my twenties. i think back then i was travelling alot for work kali and i needed something to anchor me to my fitness. i figured kalau belari i would only need a pair of sneakers.

I finally bought a Garmin. and i am in love with it. it plays music too which means that i do not have to lug my iphone on my runs anymore. barat kali ah iphone ani.. mcm memakai weighted vest bah tu belusir. haha.

i dont know why i didnt purchase one sooner. god knows how many iphones ive gone through over the last 10 years. banyak. pasalnya ia lakas rusak cos over-time it gets soaked in my sweat and tears and i also have a maniacal tendency of dropping it…like it’s hot.

hehe.

i’ll be taking the watch for its first 21km tomorrow.

yayyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy

ok bye.

Don’t you just love the freedom of being in a place and not having to worry about bad encounters or experiences? Macam you mentally cordon off a small safe space for yourself … this could be your bedroom, kitchen or even a parking spot at the office that you label as a stress-free zone. A spot where you are at your most comfortable and where you know that nothing can come between you and your inner peace.

It is only when these spaces are invaded that you realize how attachment and expectations placed on something sucks. you will always (almost) end up getting disappointed.

So one of my spots got invaded recently and I’ve been quite affected by it. I’m sure a new sanctuary isn’t a hard find…but this time, i feel.. mcm why should i? i was here first.

gah. just felt like writing down my feelings today.

that’s all.

it’s Wednesday. we’re halfway through the week already!

Nothing much happening this week other than the usual things. Hoping that things will pick-up. A splash of good news would be good.

I’m also thinking of ways on how to make this week better for me. When things get super humdrum.. i have started a habit of setting small goals for myself… easily attainable ones.. jangan jua yang mcm berabis berabis payah atu mcm membali rumah 10 bilik atas bukit, jadi bidadari.., menangkap bulan……..atu membari stress jua tu mamanyaa. Just to give you an idea here are my small goals this week:

– cut down sugar.
– bangun sembahyang malam (at least 2 kali)
– stay on low carbs just until Saturday.
– run 3 more times.
– donate to charity.
– try not to give a shit about what people think
– mind my own business.
– reduce screen time by 50%.

well for today, I’m just trying not to eat the Twix that has been sitting in my drawer and maybe get a run in later in the afternoon.

[insert funny thumbs up whatsapp sticker yang cali here]

kiss me.

see i did say i was going to post regularly.

I did my run at BKC this morning and then straight to hot yoga… that is not Bikram.

I miss my Bikram yoga days (sans sex scandal) so i decided to sign up for a hot yoga class at Be Yoga, Kiulap. It’s pretty rare that i venture outside of Serusop but my body was craving the twist and turns of yoga. haha mcm kiulap ani over on the west coast bunyinya and im on the east.

anyway i was aware that the practice didn’t follow bikram sequence but it was still a good workout anyway… and after a long week of fartlek running and weight training my body was screaming for it.

Just gonna take it easy this month. I’m anticipating a very busy Novemeber at work. What’s new kan? the last leg of the year is always the most hectic.

Have a good week everyone.

Namaste.

I have decided that i will write again.

Because i dont have the guts to vlog. bida jua tu kamu meliat idung ku kambang kampis arah screen kamu? haha.

So picking up where we left off:

The global pandemic led me to improve my running..i ran like i was running away from it.

I started 10 years ago. I remember how it took me an hour to do a short 3km around the stadium.

This gradually decreased to 21-25 minutes and then I slowly added my distance. but because of work commitments that had taken me overseas, I was not able to be consistent, and often after weeks of being away, I come home only to start again.

In the 10 years that I’ve been running: I’ve participated in a handful of fun runs, had the privilege of running in cities like New York, London, Budapest, Tokyo, been sexually assaulted, witnessed the change in seasons first hand and completed a half marathon – all at a pace of 7km/h or slower. lol.

not traveling means that I could take this opportunity to improve my running. which I did. and now I can confidently do a 10km under 6.5km/h. of course, functional training helped too, which i picked up at a nearby Crossfit gym. oops dont think we can say CrossFit anymore….. “Mmmhmm” gym lol. The goal is to do 5km easily under 30 minutes.

Aside from my love for cardio, I also gym hop to weight lift. gym 3 inggit mamanya. My body has transformed since January and I’m hoping that i will be able to maintain these results even once covid is over and i start travelling for work again.

it’s gonna be difficult. but i guess i’ll cross the bridge when i get there?

of all the “fitness” things ive experimented with, running has resonated the most. there’s just something about it that is liberating. banar pulang it doesn’t solve your problems..but I feel the strongest and the most beautiful when i run 🙂

If you have are struggling to motivate yourself, don’t worry you are not alone..i struggle for years and i am still working it. just keep at it. visualizing yourself in your ideal body and the state of mind you want to achieve helps.

For me, it’ s not just about building a strong body. but also a strong mind. i believe the latter would help me to continue to work towards achieveing my goals and attaining new ones.

ok byeeeee.

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kiss me.